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Self Improvement | Lifestyle Transformations Blog

Archive for the 'Self Improvement' Category

Your Experience When You Go Out is Based on What You Focus on

Published by Stefan on February 22, 2009 in Articles, Dating & Relationships and Self Improvement. 1 Comment

This is something that I recently learned that really made sense to me.

When you go out, say to a nightclub, a party, or whatever it may be — your entire experience of that event is 100% based upon what you focus on.

There are only so many things we can consciously focus on at once.

For example, right now you’re probably not focusing on your heart beat, or the many sounds in the room that you’re in, or perhaps certain pain your body may be in (just recently had my wisdom teeth removed ;).  There are literally THOUSANDS of things you can focus on right now, besides reading this article on your computer (different objects in your environment, feelings, sounds, etc…).

In the same way, when you go out to a night club, there are thousands of things to focus on as well.

If you begin focusing on everyone sitting around, being bored, not having fun, the fact the club is empty, etc… then you’re going to leave that place and your experience of it was going to be “boring”.  

If you begin focusing on how much fun people are having, how great the music is, how there are so many cool things going on at once, how much fun you’re having, etc… then you’re going to leave that place and your experience may be “fun”.

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Knowledge is not enough… Action is the Ultimate Power

Published by Stefan on February 19, 2009 in Articles, Motivation and Self Improvement. 1 Comment

This is something that took me a long time to understand.

I used to spend countless hours learning and gaining knowledge.   I thought more knowledge and information would make me more successful and happier.  Not the case.  Unfortunately, this is how most of society operates.

If this was the case, then everybody with a PHD would be successful.

What separates the most successful from the rest, is not that they’re more intelligent or smarter… it’s because they stepped up and took action!

Our ability to make decisions and take action is something that everyone is capable of.  You don’t need resources or money or more time than anyone else… all you need to do are take the actions necessary to get to where you want to be.

People think that you need to learn as much as possible about a subject before you take action on it — WRONG!  This is not the case… however, knowing a lot about it can help, it is also hindering you from achieving the success that you want.

Men think that learning as much as possible about meeting women and relationships is going to make them successful in this area… WRONG!  I can’t tell you how many guys I know that know so much about meeting women and all the theory and tactics… but still suck at it and can’t get a girlfriend if they wanted to.

We are not short of information.  The information is there and always will be.  We live in an information age.  What is lacking, is our ability to make decisions and take action towards our goals.  

Forget learning more… you know enough!  Don’t get caught up in the trap of constantly going to seminars, reading books, going to classes, etc… as long as it’s not holding you from acting on what you need to do.

Yes, I still see a ton of value in learning and reading and all that jazz.  In fact, I do that constantly.  However, it’s your ability to take what you learn and practice and apply it that will make you successful and achieve the goals that you want.

Ask yourself… what actions can you take today that will make you closer to achieving what you want?

It isn’t learning more about health and fitness… it’s going to the gym!

It isn’t learning more about meeting women and dating… it’s going out and approaching 12 women!

Hopefully this post will call some people to action!

Stefan
Executive Coach
Lifestyle Transformations 

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The Dip by Seth Godin Review

Published by Stefan on August 31, 2008 in Motivation, Reviews and Self Improvement. 0 Comments

The Dip is a great little book written by the popular business blogger Seth Godin.  In my opinion, everyone should read this book as early in their life as possible.  It’s a quick quick and you’ll get through it in about 2 hours.

Seth’s message is simple.  His writing is direct and to the point.  Very easy to understand.

When is it time to quit?

In todays society, we’re taught never to give up.  Don’t quit.

Seth has a different perspective.  He states that winners quit all the time and that it’s important to know how to quit the right stuff at the right time.

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Ayahuasca — Spirit Medicine

Published by Stefan on August 29, 2008 in Articles, Miscellaneous and Self Improvement. 6 Comments

The other day I had an intense experience.

My friend and life coach invited me to a spiritual ceremony that was taking place here in Vancouver, which I decided to check out.  A shaman from Peru by the name Diego was in town for a few days hosting this event.

The ceremony was based around the use of a ancient medicine called “Ayahuasca”, also known as the “teacher plant”, which has been used for thousands of years by the indigenous people of the Amazon for holistic healing, empowerment, and spiritual insight.

An active ingredient of the Ayahuasca brew is DMT, which is naturally produced in the human brain, known for causing psychological and neurological states.  DMT is believed to play a role in the visual effects of natural dreaming, and also near-death experiences and other mystical states.

And so the purpose of Ayahuasca is to induce you into a full state of consciousness — a state where you lose total control, and every fear, insecurity, and your “inner demons” arise.

The experience can be so intense, as a lot of childhood traumas and past experiences which have been suppressed for years come up and you’re faced to confront them.  The process of “letting go” and surrendering to what you’re facing has been proven to be transformative. 

The taking of Ayahuasca has been associated with the cures of depression, addictions, cancers, and is known for many other spontaneous remissions.  For others, it is used to clear emotional blocks and to gain a sense of peace.

It is said that many notable celebrities have publicly discussed their use of Ayahuasca, such as Sting, Tori Amos, and Paul Simon.

For myself, I don’t have anything serious going on in my life or anything needing to “cure.”  My intent with Ayahuasca was to destroy any fear, anxiety or limitations that have been holding me back — and to take the level of love I have for myself and others to another level.  And in my ceremony, I feel I accomplished that.

The experience I went through is impossible to describe.

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Be The Shiny Man

Published by Cheyenne on August 21, 2008 in Articles, Dating & Relationships and Self Improvement. 1 Comment

I am about to share with you a universal truth, the content of which will skyrocket your level of attractiveness.

Ready? Women love shiny things.

From a very early age women are conditioned to be drawn to things that are sparkly and shiny: lip gloss, glitter, diamonds. An ad I saw not to long ago on TV sums it up nicely: “Diamonds – they take a woman’s breath away. Not sometimes, but always.”

I call that breath-taking moment, where everything else fades away and the woman is completely tuned in, the “Oooo Shiny Moment”.

Instead of going into a long thing, let me cut to the chase: You need to BE THE SHINY MAN.

http://www.floridamarine.org/images/articles/2513/2513_5102.gif

The woman of your dreams could be out during the day shopping, running errands, on the phone, and then you roll up – Oooo Shiny Moment.

Or she could be out at the nightclub, loud music, lights, surrounded by a barrage of guys, and then she sees you – Oooo Shiny Moment.

Let me explain what this looks like in practice. Imagine any public gathering. In the distance you see a man. He’s having a blast. People around him are having a blast. In his eyes you see the sparkle that comes from knowing exactly what kind of woman he wants, and what he has to offer to create relationships that are mutually fulfilling. As you keep watching him, you notice he loves challenges – Whether its pushing to make the ordinary extraordinary, or rolling up to a girl surrounded by 12 unusually oversized men, he’s the man to do it.

1) The Word “Be”
If think you can trick or fool a woman by ‘doing’ a series of things, you’re dead wrong. You have to eat, breath, sleep the essence of what it means to be the shiny man. With that goes a laundry-list of bullet-proof beliefs and attitudes.

2) The Word “The”
This is your reality and world. You are the one, the only, Shiny Man.

3) The Word “Shiny”
You’re letting your gut-level honesty shine, and your sense of fun and creativity, and your love of people and women shine.

4) The Word “Man”
I didn’t say entertainer, who looks for a reaction. I also didn’t say boy, who hides behind excuses and stories. But a MAN. All the fun, energy, creativity comes from a place of being firmly grounded in who he is.

People often mistake being The Shiny Man with being high-energy… Nothing could be farther from the truth. You can be the shiny man, have fun, and when you roll up to that woman of your dream be very calm and relaxed, look her straight in the eye. You know you’re the man, and you’re letting every part of the REAL YOU shine. She will feel it. And just like a deer staring straight into the headlights, she won’t be able to look away.

Cheyenne
Executive Coach
Lifestyle Transformations

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Jim Collins – Good To Great Review

Published by Cheyenne on August 5, 2008 in Reviews and Self Improvement. 0 Comments

Book Photo 

This book had been sitting on my bookshelf for quite some time. When I left for Europe it was one of three books I took with me, The 4-Hour Workweek and As A Man Thinketh being the other two.

The amount of research and analysis that has gone into this book is mind-boggling. A research team of over 25 people, headed by Jim Collins, spent 5 years (!) to distill what it takes to make the leap from an average company with average results to an outstanding company with outstanding results – consistently and over very long timeframes. Data was accumulated by looking at revenues, stock value, and by performing intensive interviews with employees and executives of companies.

The simplicity of the concepts belies their power and effectiveness. I found as much a set of things to do as much as I found a set of things NOT to do. The basis of making the transition to greatness comes down to three key areas: Continue reading ‘Jim Collins – Good To Great Review’

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The Secret To Life… sort of

Published by Cheyenne on July 18, 2008 in Articles, Miscellaneous and Self Improvement. 1 Comment

Are you an achiever? Are you constantly pushing yourself to grow and evolve?

If you’re like me, then the answer to the above is a resounding yes. Let’s continue…

Do you often find yourself stressed or exhausted?

Be completely honest…

When was the last time you did absolutely nothing?

Now when I say absolutely nothing I don’t mean procrastinating on facebook, but consciously not doing anything and being 100% ok with it. If I lost you, I ask that you bear with me as I take you through a secret of life that wasn’t clear to me until recently.

Think about what makes life worth living. It’s not the achievements and trophies or the number of girls you slept with, but rather the moments where you felt on top of the world, where you felt fulfilled, where you felt loved and were giving love to those around you. That’s what life is about!

If your journey is one of constant go-go-go and pushing yourself hard, you’ll have a dampened experienced when those moments arrive. Or worse, you don’t even recognize it because you’re so caught up. STOP

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As a Man Thinketh - James Allen Book Review

Published by Stefan on June 19, 2008 in Reviews and Self Improvement. 2 Comments

Recently just finished a quick read: As a Man Thinketh by James Allen.

I’ve heard about this book time and time again.  It’s a classic.  I had to see what I was missing out on.

The message is simple and it’s a short 1-hour read.

“As you think, you shall become.”

That is the underlying message of the book.  James Allen was the first to discover this fact.

The theme of all of Allen’s works is that each one of us has the power to form our own character and to create our own happiness.  The conditions of our lives are closely related to our inner state.  Allen encourages his readers to think positive thoughts, which will inevitably lead them to take positive actions.

This is what “the Secret” and the “Law of Attraction” is based on.  By focusing on the positive, you attract more positive in your life.  By focusing on the negative, you attract the negative.  But, this book is a lot deeper than that.

James Allen goes into how disease and health are related to your thoughts.  In fact, everything from WHO YOU ARE is made up by your thoughts.

Disease and health, like circumstances, are rooted in thought.  Sickly thoughts will express themselves through a sickly body.  Thoughts of fear have been known to kill a person as speedily as a bullet, and they are continually killing thousands of people just as surely though less rapidly.  The people who live in fear of disease are the people who get it.  Anxiety quickly demoralizes the whole body and lays it open to the entrance of disease; while impure thoughts, even if not physically indulged, will soon shatter the nervous system.

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Time With Her VS Living Your Life

Published by Cheyenne on June 10, 2008 in Dating & Relationships and Self Improvement. 1 Comment

You’ve made it - she’s in your life. You have an amazing time together and a good connection. What’s next?

Do you drop your daily rituals and activities to spend more time with her?
Do you reduce or even stop hanging out with your friends?
Do you make her the focal point of your life?

If you were anything like what I used to be, the answers to any and all the above would be yes. And on the surface, it looks like a great proposition. You get to see, smell, and touch her every day. Every free moment is spent with a girl you adore. She makes you happy.

As you peel the layers, however, you discover some new beliefs that are growing in your mind: “Only she can make me happy.” “I need her to be fulfilled.” “If she leaves my life, I have nothing.” And guess what? You give these beliefs enough time, they’ll begin to manifest in every aspect of your relationship eventually leading to the demise of the relationship you tried so hard to maintain.

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Sleep

Published by Jason on May 26, 2008 in Health & Fitness, Miscellaneous and Self Improvement. 3 Comments

This might seem like a topic that is obvious to most people, but I think it’s also often overlooked.

 In the past, I’ve been guilty of sacrificing sleep to go out and have fun. I’d go out and have people over at my place so often that I’d only get a few hours of sleep each night. I know many people are okay with this amount of sleep, but I’m not one of them. While this obviously gave me plenty of amazing stories and great life experiences, it didn’t always make for a very healthy life.

For the past few months, I’ve been eating better and getting more sleep. I’m happy to say that I feel great! I have tons of energy and I’ve never felt better. I feel like I can conquer the world.

A huge part of being successful with women is being in the right state of mind. If you’re tired and not feeling well, you won’t be at your best. Don’t neglect the importance of taking care of yourself. When your body and mind are taken care of, success in other areas of life won’t be far behind!

 Jason
Executive Coach
Lifestyle Transformations

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